3:00 on a Monday morning

I am tired…and not in an “I should go to bed” type of tired. My tired is tired of being hurt and lied to by the people I throw all of my trust into. I give them everything, and in return, I get spat on.

Disgusting.

I am tired of having to cheer myself up because each time I have to do it the effects are never long-lasting. There needs to be someone out there somewhere who is meant to keep me happy.

The routine is so old by now that I actually just fall into the motions without any forethought. I give myself a manicure/pedicure and I watch The Hills because the next day I wake up feeling just as fabulous as Lauren Conrad looks.

My true nature is really a dangerously spiked cocktail of Audrina and Lauren. I am the good girl who falls for all the wrong guys and allows myself to continuously lose myself in a toxic relationship. I spiral, for a while, until I end up here – painting nails and viewing season 1 of The Hills. It has been almost a year since I have needed my girls. I have not had a proper chill session with them since before I met Zachary. I kicked them to the curb because I thought I found my bliss.

Wrong! So wrong.

I love him…I do, but I refuse to be the Audrina to his Justin Bobby.

Not happening!

My ideal mate is someone who wants to start getting serious, settling down, and thinking about saving for the future, kids, a house. I want a house in Napa Valley; I want to move to Los Angeles. My mate needs to be able to pay for my expensive take-out habits, my book store addictions, my Amazon purchases, and all the other spendy things I do.

I need Brody Jenner, not…um…well…someone who is not making good money.

If there is a man out there who would not mind whisking me away to Cabo San Lucas tomorrow that would be excellent.

Is spendy even a word? I do not believe so, but I have it on good authority that a writer can invent her own words.

Today, I have an interview in Manhattan. I should sleep, but I am waiting for my nails to dry. Plus I am watching The Hills.

Lemme get back to these things so I can sleep soon.

 

Peace out!

I will let you know all about the interview.

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